singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
