Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
