Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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