How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
