i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
