North Korea, Best Korea!
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
