just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
