Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
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