Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
