4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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