I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
