Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
