The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
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Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
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Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.