just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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