That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
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Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
So many bounce houses so little time
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
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he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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