If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
