How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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