My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I have post one night stand depression
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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