I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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