mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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