I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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