I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
