So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
