Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
