Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Someone shit on the floor
if only i could text you this smell
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
