It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Randomize
