are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize