He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Ladies don't puke and tell
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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