in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
