You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Randomize
