I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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