I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize