She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
