he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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