she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize