I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
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