oh god the rape fog is back!
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
