my cup is half full, half full of rum.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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