I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
