I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Randomize