Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize