so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
