I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize
