Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize