I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize