Can i not drive my cunt home
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
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