I feel like I'm in dance class right now
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.