is your mom at the bar?
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
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