Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
