Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize