can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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